Good day to you too. Back from limbo. It's been a while, huh? Only to cry once I open my eyes again. With what I see, with I (force myself to) face. It's a competition. It's a fight. To win, to lose and to remember, to forget.
Aaand we go on, fighting (ourselves). Wining and losing, remembering and forgeting, bringing back to life and burying. Born to lose, live to win. So one dies fighting? At what cost does he win? What does he even win?
One tries to find out who one really is. So damn hard and yet a fog of ego is blocking one's vision. The clearer it gets the more mistaken one sees one's self in the past. Would the child one be proud of who one is now, of who one became? I'm unable to imagine but i fear that, no. So, if no, would it still not be proud if he knew what one knows (sure, not much but still more than when he was a kiddo) now?
Surgery takes place. Remembering old parts, aspects of one's self and adopting them again. Rejecting current and/or older versions of one. Trying again if maybe now. Maybe one feels now more like one? He feels like oneself? Or is temporary, another mistake until he finds even more knowledge, experiences, opinions ... ?
That's all. One more question. And of course no answers. Or you think this was all about answers?
Παύλος - vlospa kasbe